The other day I was so mad about an issue (yes priests get mad too). Someone had wronged me and I had to get control of myself so that I could be productive in the work I was doing. I bet if you think about it, it would not take you long to remember a time when you got very angry at something or someone. It is called life and it is going to happen. However, how we handle our anger is what is so important.
We can probably agree that anger always finds an expression.
It may be a response to a person, or a situation, or maybe even an event.
It may be a response to a real or perceived injustice or hurt.
Or maybe it is a response to a boundary that has been crossed.
Whatever it is, your response is either healthy or unhealthy. We should always strive for the healthy response that entails nonaggressive, gently assertive actions that promote the respect of self and others.
We should not have unhealthy or sinful expressions that involve acting in aggrerssive ways that hurt others. Whether one yells, uses violence, or withdraws, the motivation involves revenge or payback.
When Anger comes your way try these four steps to effectively manage it.
1-Determine the source of the anger and avoid the triggers.
2-Delay the expression of anger (exercise, write down feelings, talk to someone. etc)
3-Control yourself (confront the issue and empathize)
4-Settle the issue (practice the Fruit of the Spirit from Galatians 5:22-23)
I pray that these suggestions will assist you when you face episodes of anger.
What techniques do you use to control anger? Respond and let me know. I would love to hear your thoughts!
Blessings,
Fr. John Mozingo+
(Thanks to Dr. T. Clinton and Dr. R. Hawkins for their information in Biblical Counseling)